Something Wicked This Way Comes

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I woke up this morning to annoying shock-like feelings in my face [both sides]. Like most of you, I already know this is going to escalade into something worse either by tonight or when I wake up tomorrow morning. I've been very depressed about all of this, especially my pending diagnosis of Fibromyalgia. I'm a bigger girl as it is and have a hard time exercising because of the pain I feel all over my body, all the time. So while I'm sitting here, alone, I have nothing better to do than eat to comfort myself or just dwell on how ridiculous my life is. I'm 21 years old and should be able to enjoy life, but I'm too restricted.

Halloween is my birthday and I have absolutely no plans because I'm too afraid to make anymore, just in case my face or body decide to hate me that day. Last year I spent my 21st in a wheelchair because I had broken my ankle and needed surgery, and now this year I'm going to spend it either on the couch or in bed. I've been so out of it that I don't even want to take the Tegretol anymore. My memory has been so bad lately that I can't even remember where I put down the bottle or if I've even taken last night's dose or not.

Crying at this point isn't going to help. My neurologist isn't going to help.

Bring it, TN.

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Hi Taylor,
Gosh, I could relate to so many things you wrote, one thing I wanted to share was that because my memory like yours is sooo bad I decided to buy a gigantic pill case! You know the ones that go Monday thru Sunday, and are multi colored. Yup I now have one of those, of course when friends see it they can’t help but laugh, I’m young (40) and most of their parents or grandparents have these but oh well, it helps me remember when to take my meds 3 x a day as I often forget if I’ve taken them or not.
It sucks, TN sucks!
My birthday was in April, 40 is a milestone, so I envisioned a big party to celebrate, but wouldn’t you know TN reared its ugly head and the pain was out of control, my husband decided to have a party after all and just invite our closest family and friends as they all know and understand.
I’m telling you I had mixed feelings but I supplemented my meds with Advil a lot that day, dressed up and had a great time Despite the pain!!! It wasn’t easy, I couldn’t have a drink, I still had pain but having everyone over made me feel loved and not so alone with my pain.
I would try and plan something, anything, worst case scenario you just can’t do it and you cancel! But best case, you find a way to celebrate with friends and family!

Call your neuro and see about increasing the Tegretol or adding a med to the mix. I just went through this, around my birthday I started increasing the Tegretol ( with my neuro’s advice) went from 800mg up to 1600mg before the pain was under control.
That lasted 3 mths and then we just added Neurontin. It Kills me, as I hate the meds and the process BUT the pain was kicking my a** more!
Now I’m at 1600mg Tegretol and 600mg Neurontin.

We do what we have to do .
I have put on 20lbs this past year as I developed vertigo and imbalance last November, so I’ve been off work and sitting around getting fatter!
It’s depressing, I can’t do much or I fall over or get dizzy. It’s a lose lose situation.
Soooooo, when I can I try and do squats or lie on the floor and do leg lifts. I only do 5-10 and then I’m dizzy, but frig, 5-10 is better than nothing.
I’ve also started drinking more water, every time I get the munches and want to emotionally eat, I drink a big huge glass of water and try and distract myself.

I get how you feel, I really do. And I feel like that most days, it’s so hard. BUT we need to find little things to help us along, little bright spots in our days…
I’m thinking of you…Call your neuro ASAP to adjust your meds!
Spend the day coming up with a birthday celebration idea!!
21 needs to be celebrated!!
((( hugs)))