So I haven't seen the Neurologist yet, but I've managed to find a lot of the triggers, and have been just about coping.
Well, today I heard some really sad news, that a friend of mine passed away yesterday. He was a mentor to me as well as a friend.
I've not been crying. It hasn't hit me like that yet (I fear for when it does). I've just been quiet. But I have noticed the pain levels going up. Anger has been a trigger in the past, but I'm not feeling angry. More shocked. And guilty (I've noticed that about myself, I feel guilt when people die).
Hi, amberzak,
It is sad that someone has to die. The impact to someone close is great.
How did your friend die, is it an accident ? Do not keep quiet, you need to pour out your sorrow . You shouldn’t feel guilty when people die.
How do you cope with TN? What kind of medicines are you taking?
I'm sorry for your loss....you are in shock - losing a friend whether through death or other means is a great loss. You might look at my posting at the top of the page this week about grieving - called AN IMPORTANT REMINDER FOR YOURSELF AND YOUR LOVED ONES/CARETAKERS
it might help you. Guilt is a normal emotion for some - survivor guilt, guilt for many reasons. I don't know if you are on any meds - but if this stressor puts your pain over the top, you might ask for a few benzos to get you through the next couple of weeks.
By benzo I mean like clonazapam is known to help TN AND calm the nerves and relax the tight muscles from stress
Stress can very easily make TN worse - so take care of yourself
When you feel better and some time passes - you could consider helping out a subgroup of people or a charity you think your friend might have appreciated. I volunteer at hospice - those days it's hard to have my pitty parties --- but I do have them and we are allowed!
I'm quite young, 28. He was a lot older. 70s. But he was so full of life, always doing things. He was a filmmaker with so much experience in filmmaking, and he gave me so many opportunities in filmmaking.
He could be a stubborn argumentative man as well, but I never thought of him as old, or sick or anything. I don't know how he died. All I know is that he was found dead in his flat day before yesterday.
I don't take any medication, because I was allergic to most of it. I have tramadol for the days the pain gets unbearable. I don't drink hot drinks, and I try not to let myself get angry. And that's how I cope. Oh, and I've noticed less pain when I go out now the weather is sunny.
Hi amberzak,
I am so sorry you lost a great mentor and friend . You must be shocked that he passed away so suddenly . I do not know how to console people with their grief and I hope that you forgive me for my language.
When my older brother passed away suddenly, I was in shock. He was only 48 then, and we were working on something just a week earlier. I did not want to talk about it and I was very sad. My friends made me talk about it and when I did, I cried and told them everything about my brother and how I missed him. I felt better after that. Therefore I always think that it helps when you let others know about your loss.
You are so young to suffer from TN. It seems that your pain tolerant is very high. Nevertheless , I feel that you need to find if there are other things that help relieve your pain besides Tramadol . Two is better than one.
You take care.
Dear Amberzak, I'm so sorry about your friend,it's so hard to know what to say,it's a tough thing i believe it's harder when it's sudden then if he had been sick for sometime, but i do understand about your pain level going up my dad passed away 6yrs.ago this past dec. he had been sick a couple yrs. but we were very close my pain went off the chart big time especially at the cematarey they had me all covered with a big blanket to keep the wind and cold off and i cried for days and oh yes my pain stayed off the chart for weeks i felt guilty because i couldn't be their for my mom like i felt i should, i take it that crying is a trigger point for you also? then back in 1995 sept. 8th. and 9th.is when i realized how bad tn could be and how bad i needed something for the pain besides motrin while i was waiting to get into the nuroagist but 1st. my daughter needed me,at 16 and 7months along and in labor all of a sudden a big problem nobody thought anything was wrong up untill the 8th nothing could be done she passed on the 9th i got good pain meds.when we came home and we spent 2 weeks in bed my daugther and myself some how we got through it i did everything for our tiny angel that my daughter wanted,i had a nurosurgon friend that helped me with my pain i look back now and thank GoD!!! iwas on diludid and kalonopin i still am xxx to you through this hard time, friends, Dawn