So as I write this I am under attack by face. I had septoplasty recently in hopes the bone spur they removed was pressing on my nerve. So my doc lowered my dosage on my meds too see what the results would bring. I knew that this might happen but I prayed it wouldn’t. Not only did the surgery not relieve pain but because my dosage is lower I am experiencing pain like when I was first diagnosed. I feel like death could be my best friend right now. I am surviving on little sleep at a time and my TN is relentless right now.i have tried so many things to help at home while I wait for my dosage to fix in my system. I guess I am writing not for sympathy but to put it out there where people understand. When people ask what is wrong and I tell them they look at me and shrug. I was at the ER to see what they could do and they had to look it up first. I understand not everyone is going to know what TN is but if this nurse and doctor are looking it up how much could they really help and as it turned out not much. I don’t know why I have this or if it going to be with me the rest of my life but I can say TN when at its worst brings me to the edge of wanting to die. I could never do it as I have kids to care for, but I can say if I had no children TN would have won a long time ago. I pray each time I get a little sleep I will wake with less pain at least the kind I could manage. But so far no. I know hopefully soon my symptoms will let up and it will be ok but until then I can’t eat sleep or talk (the last one my husband likes) lol… But it will get better and I will be able to get back to living. Thanks for letting me rant.
Lesley, I am soooo sorry that you are hurting as BAD as you are right now now, after going through everything you have already been through and I know you have to be thinking now, why this? I am in a VERY BAD place myself right now. If you feel up to it please read my last couple of discussions. I am sitting here now waiting for a top guy from mental health to call me. He just did, to tell me he is still having trouble getting me in. Duh! It is a pain problem 1st. then the rest has just become worst, anxiety, hopelessness, ect. I am sorry I am praying for both of us right now!!I am also sorry for using your post to vent my problems. How do we somehow keep the SOMETHING to keep with this? I know I am a chicken I tried to end my life Monday in the car over looking a lake after hearing more bad news at the drs. I was in terrible pain, physically, mentally, ect. If had not been for the few pain pills I new I could take and being chichen I couldn’t go through with it. Our local newspaper is doing a story of some kind this coming Monday.I guess I keep hoping someone will have some clue when all else has failed and the pain control is not adequate. Now the man from mental health that promised he would help me some way before Friday was over because he knew I did not have enough medication for the weekend due to Dr. leaving pratice and not another new Dr. until Jan. 1st to take his place. I don’t have a clue what to do. Lesley I wish you the best and pray you find somekind of relief.As for me I hmmmmm when my level is down parts of the day or night I want to live and can think of many reasons too.On the other hand when the pain reaches a certain level it scares me so bad, especially here the last couple weeks that my insides feel a mess, I feel sick, my heart races, and I don’t know what to do with that but as soon as my pain calms down so does most of those awful feelings. I am sorry for using your post to vent and I wish I could of been of support but please know that reading your story, I know those feelings and the pain and my heart breaks for you!!
Lesley, I am soooo sorry that you are hurting as BAD as you are right now now, after going through everything you have already been through and I know you have to be thinking now, why this? I am in a VERY BAD place myself right now. If you feel up to it please read my last couple of discussions. I am sitting here now waiting for a top guy from mental health to call me. He just did, to tell me he is still having trouble getting me in. Duh! It is a pain problem 1st. then the rest has just become worst, anxiety, hopelessness, ect. I am sorry I am praying for both of us right now!!I am also sorry for using your post to vent my problems. How do we somehow keep the SOMETHING to keep with this? I know I am a chicken I tried to end my life Monday in the car over looking a lake after hearing more bad news at the drs. I was in terrible pain, physically, mentally, ect. If had not been for the few pain pills I new I could take and being chichen I couldn't go through with it. Our local newspaper is doing a story of some kind this coming Monday.I guess I keep hoping someone will have some clue when all else has failed and the pain control is not adequate. Now the man from mental health that promised he would help me some way before Friday was over because he knew I did not have enough medication for the weekend due to Dr. leaving pratice and not another new Dr. until Jan. 1st to take his place. I don't have a clue what to do. Lesley I wish you the best and pray you find somekind of relief.As for me I hmmmmm when my level is down parts of the day or night I want to live and can think of many reasons too.On the other hand when the pain reaches a certain level it scares me so bad, especially here the last couple weeks that my insides feel a mess, I feel sick, my heart races, and I don't know what to do with that but as soon as my pain calms down so does most of those awful feelings. I am sorry for using your post to vent and I wish I could of been of support but please know that reading your story, I know those feelings and the pain and my heart breaks for you!!