Applying for long term disability is very different from applying for Social Security Disability Insurance but just as with SSDI almost everyone is denied and should always appeal. No matter what, never give up your right to appeal even if the process is frustrating and depressing. And NEVER miss a scheduled appointment or deadline. That said, long term disability is easier to get approved than SSDI. I worked with government employees applying for long and short term disability and I also received state disability retirement and both long and short term disability benefits on appeal without the benefit of an attorney.
Have you discussed your concerns about the upcoming appointments with your attorney? If you haven't, I'd call him immediately and when you leave a message for him to call you back I'd convey the urgency and your panic in your voice and what you say in the voicemail or the conversation you have with the receptionist. He doesn't get paid if you don't get awarded benefits and he's there to assist you with talking points and coaching. If you're freaking out, he's concerned. If you don't convey your worries, he may take his time getting back to you which reduces the time you have to prepare for the appointments. He's juggling a lot of clients and the squeaky wheel gets moved to the top of the pile.
NEVER meet with a representative of the insurance company, including their doctors, alone. Take someone with you such as a friend, relative, coworker or even a sympathetic supervisor. Make sure they understand they are there to support you and be your vocal advocate if you aren't or cannot effectively convey just how disabling the pain and other symptoms you're experiencing are. They can't be disruptive but they must be prepared to be your voice.
Start making a list right now of each of your symptoms, the date of onset ,if you know it, how severe it is and how it impacts your life. For example, the facial pain is so severe that just opening your mouth the slightest bit is just about more than you can bear. The pain meds barely touch it but without them it's so much worse. You've tried this, this and this but they haven't significantly made a difference. The pain is so bad that it keeps you from sleeping more than a couple of hours a night and when you do sleep, you keep waking up because the pain seems so much worse at night. It's so overwhelming and you're so tired from lack of sleep that you cannot focus, it's difficult to cope and you're so emotional. You weren't like this before.
Go over the list with your advocate well in advance of the appointment and be sure they have the full picture.
When you get to the appointment they may try to exclude your support person. Try to convince them that you get easily confused and overwhelmed and they'll sit quietly.
Be sure you get a chance to convey what's on your list. The doctor is there to examine you and to try to save the insurance company money but he should also give you a chance to provide additional information especially if he hasn't asked the right questions or given you a chance to elaborate. If it's becoming apparent that you aren't being given a chance, that's when your support person needs to speak up in a calm, helpful way.
If you think your person will become aggressive or angry, don't take them. Find someone else, even if that person isn't comfortable advocating for you. More importantly than having an advocate you want an objective witness who can sit quietly and observe. After the appointment both of you should jot down a summary of how the appointment went. Was the doctor adversarial? Did he give you a chance to respond to his questions or did he cut you off by asking the next question?
Believe me, his notes are going to say if you looked well dressed, were you calm and well spoken, relaxed even if you weren't. If you're tired and worn out with pain, don't wear make up and dress your best. Don't be incoherent but convey your fatigue and frustration with becoming more and more disabled. And his notes may be a complete fantasy of what was said and done in the appointment. You want to think they'll be objective and honest but I had two outright lie about the entire appointment including details of physical examinations that never happened.
The psychiatrist is going to try to determine if it's all in your head so be convincing. Let him know how hard it is for you to not be able to work anymore, how much you miss your job and how hard it is to change your self image from someone who had a future in your chosen field or with your employer and co-workers/friends to a limited income (disability pays a lot less) , the inability to participate in activities, loss of hobbies, etc. Be discouraged but don't have a total meltdown. Convey the impact of the pain and other symptoms on the quality of your life, your relationships with family and friends. If you're seeing a psychologist, tell him you are. If you aren't, say you're trying to find one who specializes in pain (they're excellent but few and far between).
Above all, remember: this appointment is important but it isn't the end all. It's only one part of the review and if the decision doesn't go your way, APPEAL, APPEAL, APPEAL. And immediately get a referral to another specialist and get their honest evaluation to support your disabling condition and definitely point out any discrepancies in how the insurance company's doctors conducted their examinations and what actually happened.
Good luck!
