Usually, when I write a blog I am either updating about a treatment option or venting my frustrations. I guess this one is going to kinda be like that because on June 18,2012 I will be undergoing a Balloon Compression surgery to try to deaden my V1 trigeminal nerve. But I want to take a moment and give a few words of encouragement.
First off, I want to say I am a Christian - But honestly, before all of this, I wasn't a very good one. However, as I've gone through the pain, procedures, the aggrivation and the loneliness of having to endure TN in an area where it's no common - I have come to realize that I'm not alone. A lot of people would like to blame God that they have TN or think that it's a punishment, but for me personally I think it is a test of my faith or even an opportunity to witness to those around me who are facing trials and pain. I want to give a few encouraging verses from the Bible that have helped me.
Psalm 22:24 "The Lord does not hate or despise the helpless in all of their troubles. When I cried out He listened and did not turn away."
Phillipians 4:6-7 "Don't worry over anything whatever,whenever you pray tell God every detail of your needs in thankful prayer, and the peace of God, which surpasses human understanding will keep constant guard over your hearts and minds as they rest in Christ Jesus."
Joshua 1:9 "I've commanded you to be strong and brave. Don't ever be afriad or discouraged! I am the Lord your God and I will be there to help you wherever you go."
2 Corinthians 4:8-9 "We often suffer,but we are never crushed. Even when we don't know what to do, we never give up. In times of trouble, God is with us, and when we are knocked down, we get up again."
Psalm 55:22 "Pile your troubles on God's shoulders - He'll carry your load, He'll help you out. He'll never let good people topple into ruin."
And to top it off, if you have a Bible or are willing to purchase one, please look up the verses Matthew6:25-34. This changed my life because it truely allows me to see what God is doing for me and providing for me. So, even with this horrid pain and the numerous surgeries, I will continue to to turn God and thank Him for all that He has done, has provided and even for this illness called Trigeminal Neuralgia. Without TN, I was not able to see my God and his wondeful mercy. He has provided me with a Doctor/Surgeon that will go to the ends of the earth for fix me, He has given me time with paid disability and money to pay for our bills. He has given me the support of my husband and family as well as this website and He has allowed me to see past this illness and consider it not a curse but rather a blessing to reach out to those in need.
Please don't be broken hearted or scared or give up. Know that there is a God that will comfort you and a salvation that will deliver you from the emotional,spiritual and even physical pain. Don't let TN destroy you. Stand up against it and say, "My God will deliver me from this. Maybe not now, maybe not soon - But eventually He will free me and I will continue to praise Him and thank Him through this and the rest of my life."
Amen