Sugar! I tried to edit this blog and i completely deleted the original blog!
Thank you to all of you that responded. I love to hear your journies about this nasty thing we all share.
When i started this original blog i talked about how i would like to explore different options.
I have dealt with this pain since 2006 without medication. It would come and go and i just learned how to deal with it. Then in early 2011 it struck again but this time at an all new level. This time the pain came and would not go away. I finally went to the docs when i could do nothing but wither in pain. I couldnt cry because the tears hurt my face. I did not eat for 5 days.
The doc put me on lyrica which was like a freakin miracle! No more pain. Thank you lord!
Then i went to the neuro and i had an mri which was clear and was advised by the neuro to "live with it, this is something you will have for the rest of your life. You can either fight it or live with it." Then he changed me from lyrica to tegratol with tramacet for any break through pain. The tegratol was useless! And yes Dr. Lo, I will fight it becauseI cannot and will not live my life like this!
As I weened myself off of Lyrica and on to the tergratol, as per neuros direction, the pain hit again. Fierce. So fierce that i wld lay in bed stiff as a board because any movement set it off. Again it was like someone had plucked my nerves like a guitar string! Then when it would calm it felt like my face was on fire and someone was ripping my teeth out! This time it was 4 days before it calmed down and i could eat. So, back on Lyrica I went. But at an extreme dose because it was just not working as it had before.
Then a week ago, the pain hits again. Why? I dont know. I guess because this thing we have is just plain old nasty and evil! This time, I went 4 days again with no eating or drinking, except to try and take the Lyrica. I am sure you all know how terribly painful this is and how much nerve you need to build up to even take your meds! I hate it!
The Lyrica was doing nothing and it is at this point that I am thinking there has got to be another way, another solution, another something cause this sure as hell aint workin! So, back to the docs I go to, one, find out why the hell the second neuro has not called me, it has been close to a month, and second, to try to find some support from him. What I got was percocete and a "well that is the way specalists work, you may not hear for 3 months about an appt." Seriously! This is what you call support!
Ok! I am on my own.
The entire time I have been on this journey I have tried to have mind over matter with the pain. I truly believe that we are in control of our bodies and our mind. I believe that what we are feeling, emotionally, mentally and physically is controlled by our minds. However, the conscious mind and the self conscious mind are two different entities. So while I am trying to tell myself that this pain is going to ease, just breath it out, my self conscious mind is saying "fuck you here I am!" and whacks me with a good, fierce dose of pain.
I have started going to a wellness centre which deals with chiro, massage and other techiniques to help people heal their bodies and mind. I have been given a great book called "You can heal your body." This book helps you on a journey to in basic terms retrain your mind to get rid of all the negative and critical thought patterns that you have. The belief is that it is these thought patterns that are causing your physical ailments.
The book states that neuralgia is caused by built up guilt and the inability to communicate. So, you need to look back in your life, when the pain started, or each time it hits and think about what was going on at the time.
Hmmmm! Food for thought for me.
I just know, for myself, I do not want to be on a roller coaster of meds and doctors. I have nothing against either of these and for some people that is the journey that they need to have. I cast no judgement on anyone for the jouney which they choose for themselves. I know how hard and very very painful this is.
I can honestly say these things as I sit here pain free at the moment. When my pain hits again, which I am most certainly sure it will, I cannot guarantee you that percs will not cross my lips!
I am still taking Lyrica. This is not a journey that will happen overnight.
I am not sure if anyone else has the same beliefs or has or is trying this method of healing, but I would love to hear from any or all of you. The support would be great:)