I am not sure what to really write here. I just felt the need to write. I was pain free and medication free for 2 years. I was starting to think that maybe my doctor had it wrong after all. Then, on Saturday, March 26, 2011, it came back. I was helping my finace film a Distinguished Young Women show and suddenly felt a shock race through my face. Perhaps that is not accurate. It was like the shock therapy I've had done on my knee. Only it was in my temple. And it was a million times worse than any shocks ever administered to my knee. So. Where was I? Oh yes.
The pain came back during the most inconvenient time. I was helping my fiance and had my 8 yeaer old daughter with me. Jarod, my fiance, has never been through this process with me. He freaked out. He wanted to call my father to come pick me up and take me to the emergency room. Of course he could not leave the show. I had a strong feeling that the TN I had (almost) forgotten about was suddenly back. I told him I would be ok and to do the show. I don't remember how I made it through that show. I barely remember the show.
Sunday was just as bad. I had to stand outside for 3 hours, in misery, with my daughter so she could sell Girl Scout Cookies. (We did not sell them all and I will have to pay $113; a difficult feat being a full time student with no job as well as being out of financial aide availability.) I do not live with Jarod. My daughter and I live with my parents. I know this is sad at the age of 28, but it happens. Anyways. I went home. My littlest brother came over. He took one look at me and said I needed to go to the emergency room. I was still in intense pain.
Monday came around. My little brother (Josh) had and appoinment at 9:30am. It was Savannah's first day of spring break. Amazing I waited this long to share my daughter's name. She will be 9 on April 26th. It's coming up. I digress again. So Josh had an appointment and asked me to drive him. I did not want to drive because I cannot focus right with the pain. I only agreed because he and Jarod were conspiring. I say this with utmost love. Josh agreed to watch Savannah while I saw the on-call doctor. So, I did.
The "new" on-call doctor worked with my normal docot a lot. He knew my history. He had no doubts what was wrong when I told him the symptoms. He ordered bloodwork and an MRI. Of course, this totally sucked because I am a student with student health insurance in a different state. Student health did not want to pay the MRI. They wanted me to do it at student health. They wanted me to transfer my case. Do you really think I'm going to start over with student health? No way! Besides, I graduate December 2011. Then what would I do? I wouldn't be using student health. So, the doctors fought and argued with them. They cited pre-existing conditions (I've had TN for 7 years after all) and went off about how important an MRI is for my diagnosis and treatment. Student health finally relented for the small fee of $1250. Yipes.
Monday. I go home with Nuerontin. I am sure I spelled that wrong. 100mg three times a day for ten days. Then increase the dose. Sounds familiar. I rest the rest of Monday. Sleep.
I only have classes Tuesdays and Thursdays. My classes on Tuesdays are 9am-8:50pm. Thursdays it's 11am t0 4:45pm. Tuesday I was in lots of pain. LOTS OF PAIN. I did not make it to my first class. Or my second class. Or my third class. I was babysat however. My friends, Holly and Ahley, noticed I was "off." They stayed with me the whole day. I told them what was going on. They made it their mission to not leave me alone. My first class is next door to Holly's class. My second class is with Holly. My third class is next door to Ashley. My fourth class is with both of them. Makes it easy for them to babysit. Or hover. They did not leave me alone once. They brought me food and drink which I did not want. I made it to my last class. The one from 6pm-9pm that I share with them.
During the day, the hospital called 4 times. Four times. Before 10! That is when I found out my MRI was finally approved and was to take place the next morning at 10am. I was shocked at the quick turnaround. And began to wonder how I would manage to pay for this terrible disease.
In class, they texted me to go home. I drove to school. It's out of state. I live in one state and commute to the other. However, it's only 10 miles. Yay border towns. Jarod is not out of this picture. He was working, but constantly texted me or stopped by the "quiet room" to check on me. He works on the University full time. He arranged with my dad to pick me up and drive my car home. Class let out early. I was home by 8pm. I was sound asleep by 8:30pm. I slept 12 hours.
Holly came to my house at 9am. She had her 4 sons with her. She took Savannah to the science center with her boys. She kept her so I could have my MRI in peace and rest some afterwards. I was planning on dropping Savannah off at daycare, but this was much better for her. The MRI was... well... an MRI. Loud. Boring. Disorienting. Cold. All that jazz. I wore my PJ's for it. At least I was comfy. I had a burger from the hospital while waiting to see if they wanted to do a second MRI with contrast. They decided not to.
Thursday I made it to all my classes. Friday, Jarod decided to take me out of town. I was feeling better. We got a 2 bedroom suite at the base of the Mountains. We walked around. I bought a new purse. Savannah got $20 walking-around money. We all bought new PJ's and Tangled. We sat around in our PJs and watched the movie. It was rather cute. It was a good weekend. Oh, and Jarod bought me beautiful heart-shaped emerald earrings. I am glad I can wear them without triggering pain. My triggers are near my temple and eye.
So we went home. Monday I rested. Tuesday was another long day of classes. Wednesday was my followup. It was rather short. My doctor increased the does on my medication to 300mg three times a day and said he'd see me in another week.
Today. Today. I was ok most of the day. Now I am in so much pain. As I type this, I cringe. My temple. My eye. It's so bad at this second. I hope the meds work soon. I am still being babysat by my friends. My family checks up on me. My dad, brothers, and sister are worried. My mom thinks I am faking it. She thinks there is no such thing and it's all in my head. Well... it is in my head. But it is not fake. I tried to explain to her that they don't just throw around things like MRIs and anticonvulsants. But she just rags on me. She says I don't need medication. She says I am just being a baby over a "little discomfort." Oh mom. I would not even wish this on you just so you know what I am going through. It's too bad; I don't want anyone to hurt like this.
I got some great news today, however. The state approved my application for state medical. They backdated it to March 1st. That means I don't have to pay the MRI costs. Or the $58.99 copay on my pills. Is it called a copay? That's the amount I owe after insurance. So, that is a major blessing. Also, I am starting Occupation Therapy on April 18th. I have no idea what that is, what to expect, what the goals will be, or what they will do. But it was reccomended. I will try anything to lessen or get rid of this pain.