I've been on this constant addition of new drugs + higher dosages for months and months and months. The past 4 months my pain has really evolved a lot, up into my eye — lots of twitching etc. Anyhow, as part of my situation — I just feel like CRAP most of the time. I'm TIRED. I sleep more than I'm awake. I feel a cloud of depression hang over me that I feel is a mix of ALL of the drugs (how can it not be!? I take SO MANY) + just the situation and I am still in pain. I get aching, slow throbbing, eye twitching. Mostly livable stuff, but just annoying reminders. Reminders that I'm 30 — I sit in bed a lot because I'm tired, I don't have a lot of energy to do the things I want to do, my brain is so sluggish, I can't have a baby because of the drugs, etc etc etc. I try not to focus on these things but where I'm going IS ...
My Dr. said today that he thinks I'm bi-polar ... I thought that was out of nowhere. I normally have a lot of energy, I am a happy happy person, bright and shiny, very outgoing, very chatting, I LOVE people, I love LIFE!!!!