I have to say with all honesty, its waring me down and the monster inside has risen. I know I am irritable ,short, and intolerable right now. Especially with my immediate family. I dont mean to be but what happens after battling with this pain I become the monster also. I found myself like this last nite, I did apologize however, its as difficult for my family to watch as me being in pain. I took pause regrouped and the best thing for me personally is i retreat to my bedroom to fall asleep because honestly right now is the only period of day I am pain free and I dont hurt my family. Just being Honest!
I can totally relate. I found myself so frustrated last night I even dropped the F bomb on my own mother more than once. I don’t know if anyone else gets frustrated from this, but every time I say I’m in pain she wants an in depth description of exactly what the pain feels like. I can hardly find words to describe it to my doctors and she wants a description of each pain I suffer all day long. It’s exhausting and frustrating. I finally had to tell her to back off but I could see her feelings were hurt. I just had surgery 18 days ago. I totally understand that feeling of just wanting to go in your room and go to sleep. Less pain for you and fewer people to accidentally upset because of your fragile state of mind. Totally normal for anyone living with this much pain I think.
(((((((HUGS))))))))))
I feel your pain....maybe one or more of these suggestions will help:
1. See if there is a local TNA support group in your area -- they really are wonderful
2. Perhaps get a low dose anti-anxiety med to take the edge off when things are at their worst
3. Go to google -( Images) type in trigeminal neuralgia --- show somebody you love - what this pain looks like
4. Have you tried any prescription lidocaine patches?
Keep posting - we are here almost 24/7!
*hugs* ...sometimes it's just too much to deal with our own internal stuff..AND try to deal with external stuff like family. That's just the way it is. I, too, have had to apologize for being short tempered and not so loveable while having pain.
For us, we've kind of developed a system....basically, if i'm in pain, my son (who is 15ys) will ask if i'm ok. If i shake my head no, or just don't answer him, he knows to leave me alone. He knows that it's nothing he's done, but that i just can't deal with him. So he goes to his dad with whatever he needs. On good days, i've explained that i just can't handle worrying about his needs and my own. I still love him and all that..but i can't do it. My husband, on the other hand....he just lets whatever mean, horrible things i say/do roll off him. He knows i am simply lashing out in pain or frustration. Often, if i'm being bitchy or short tempered....he'll just walk up and hug me til i stop. It sounds kind of simplistic maybe...but it's what works for us.
It helps a lot if you can help those close to you understand the pain you are going through. With my son, i really explained the anatomy of the nerves in my face/mouth and how they make me hurt at times and how the medicines i have work to combat that. ...and how they sometimes aren't enough. My husband sometimes does his own research about it (when he thinks i'm not noticing...lol) I think that really helps when they understand what's really going on. It's easier for them to forgive the short temper and un-niceness.
But in the end, a heartfelt apology is good too!
Remember you are not alone, and we DO know just what it's like to have days like you're having.....*hugs*
~Mistee
I totally get where your're coming from and if we're talking about honesty....at the moment I just feel like running away, on my own and telling no-one where I'm going, so I think how you are feeling at the moment is 'normal' for us who have to live with TN!
Thanks for the understanding everyone, it does help to have everyone onboard that I can vent to without having to apologize because we are all in this together.
Thanks again
My Best
Joanne
I am so with you about the family thing. I am exactly the same with my wife, who is more than supportive in this. It hurts her so much. I can’t deal sometimes and just want to curl up with a good dose of sleeping pills to shut off the world.
Here is hoping you find relief.
Smash