Well...I was waiting on it; and BOOM...at the end of the day with my students in the room, WHAM! That ever present fear that this would flair happened - and I really didn't know what to do. I just sat there, couldn't move, speak, look at anyone, nothing...the pain was so bad that tears started, couldn't help it. I walked to my lab, leaving them in the classroom. When I returned, they looked at me like I was some alien or something...I truly didn't know how to handle it, what to say, how to make them feel okay while I was riddled with pain. I need your help and advice in how to approach my students - again, these are 15 - 17 year olds, they truly can't handle too much... I am still not wanting 'just people' to know of my TN - only ones I trust that will not treat me or look at me differently....that bothers me, and teenagers can be the cruelest of them all (you high school teachers know what I am talkin' about)! Been a difficult day... Help?
I’ve not really told people about TN, but when someone at uni saw me crying in the toilet, they asked if I had toothache and so I just said yes because it was the easiest thing to say. Don’t know whether that could help you?
I’m sorry it’s been such a hard day. I could not bear TN without Neurontin. When this first started with me, I’d go pale when the pain shot up. Since then , I’ve had twoGamma knives and one MVD. So pain is more like type 2 tn rather than the stabbing episodes, which are type 1 symptoms. The best advice I can think of is take your meds on time, every time. This will help bring the episode down. If you keep a pain journal, you might notice that your pain is worse around your
Mensus.
What does your administration say about it? What can you share with your students? I might just give a little speech about having some health issues with your jaw/teeth and it's painful. Leave it at that. I am not a teacher, but kids can handle simple truth and most are grateful when they are prepared for this type of thing. That way they are not fearful to approach you.
Remember that no matter what, some students are already making fun of you, because that is what they do. You probably have just not heard it yet.
Cris, I am with Lisa on this one, and I would keep it simple and say you are suffering from nerve pain and need a little time alone until it passes. They are old enough to understand people have health issues and as Lisa says run it passed the school to make sure that this is ok with them. Do your school know about the condition?
My heart goes out to you and Amber as teaching must be the most difficult profession to do with TN. My son is also a teacher and I will ask him tonight what his thoughts are.
Chris, I'd also say that while I've been homeschooling my kids in their early years with TN, at home we work a bit differently than when they are in their classes 2 days p/week. I only have one 5th grader now and this will be our last year (I think). We are hoping he will pass the test to get into the advanced program at a Jr HIgh/High School nearby where my oldest graduated from and my daughter is currently in 7th grade.
One good thing about TN is that when it began when they were babies, 2 & 3, I'd say it's time to go play w/o mommy now…I have to put heat on my owie…they'd kiss my cheek and be on their merry way. Now, I start my 5th grader and he goes from there, doing independent work until I get back to him. I'm able to get 3 solid hours of one-on-one and he manages 3 hours of independent work. When I'd go pale while in pain in the earlier years, everyone in my home knew what was happening to my face. I think you should explain to your colleagues about jaw/teeth/cheek pain as well as the kids. They will understand that you need to take a few moments to compose yourself when in pain. The good think about TN is that it knows where the back door is located!
With my home business, I told my clients back in 2002 when this happened and they still come to me for high-end design work and give me soft deadlines to work into my days. So, when I'm in pain, I rest, and when I'm pain free, I work. But this would be difficult for you in a classroom. Especially when speaking may provoke this monster. I really had to talk with my clients about it, albeit briefly, because my attitude would go from happy go lucky to a moaning type of speaking. It must have felt weird to them to call and hear me in my normal happy mood and then a few hours later hear the agony in my voice. I think more people will be impressed with your "whatever it takes, I will do this" attitude and the honest assessment of your condition. When we work towards our goals regardless of what obstacle is in view, we gain strength. Please take good care of yourself. I'll be praying for you.
Blessings!
Lynda
I am a 4th grade teacher, and wouldn't tell my students/families for the first few months at a new school.
When I finally had to, because of all of the absenses, pain, etc. half of them were supportive, and the other half went about their business.
The thing is, only people that are around you every day will really know what you deal with. Your students will never really understand. But the thing I have noticed about young people, they do genuniely care. Be honest. Be human most of all.
They get it.
Cris, I am just ending a 2 week medical leave from work because I could not do my job with this pain. And I work from home, away from coworkers and my boss! I can't imagine working "stage front" as a teacher with this. You have my respect!
I told my boss and coworkers I had a nerve disorder that was causing massive pain and I needed a couple of weeks to allow my meds to work. I didn't get into details.
However, I have an 18 yr old and a 15yr old that know about my conidition. I think you need to tell kids *something*. The rumors will fly around the school if you don't give them something to go on. Kids will make up the wildest stories about how you "spaced out" because you were on drugs or you had a "fit" or something ridiculous like that. I think you need to tell your students you are having a nerve problem, or just give fib a little and tell them you have TMJ and you get spasms in your jaw and you can't talk at that time and need to remove yourself from the classroom to massage your jaw or apply heat or something. You would be surprised how many teens know what TMJ is (and maybe suffer themselves!).
You should give them a specific task to complete while you are out of the room or even put one of the more responsible kids "in charge" but don't just leave them with nothing to do. :)
I hope this helps. Just remember that kids will make up something MUCH worse if you don't tell them what's going on.
Best of luck to you!
Jess
Good Luck Cris whatever you decide to tell them.. Min
Agreed with Jess...I almost suggested the TMJ fib too, but I have a huge policy of truth that I didn't. That being said, you could say it's "like TMJ." TMJ is considered to be a chronic pain condition as well. I like the the description of the nerve disorder and saying something along the lines of "severe nerve pain in my face. If you all know what TMJ is, that involves pain in the jaw, this involves the nerves."
yeah...I agree, but I am just not ready to divulge info on my personal life. I have talked to them in general's when I have been absent...my adminitration knows, I sent them info that explained what it is and what we go through. They are super supportive and understand that I am more of a private person...you have to be with students these days. Sure, I build relationships with them, but just leaving it at a professional level - period. I appreciate your suggestions...I love my kiddos and truly don't want them to be scared...they have so much they live and deal with that school is a safe place and the teachers they spend MOST of their time with becomes a constant in their lives. I appreciate your feedback...
Lisa (iamrite) said:
What does your administration say about it? What can you share with your students? I might just give a little speech about having some health issues with your jaw/teeth and it's painful. Leave it at that. I am not a teacher, but kids can handle simple truth and most are grateful when they are prepared for this type of thing. That way they are not fearful to approach you.
Remember that no matter what, some students are already making fun of you, because that is what they do. You probably have just not heard it yet.
thanks so much Jess - ...I have given 'generals' on why I was out; just no details. I am on low dosages of Teg during the day so I am not WEIRD at school and have to take double when I get home. This day was an incredibly stressful day. Today was a little better as far as just 'twinges', CERTAINLY not like yesterday! I totally hear you about teens and how they will 'talk'. I have a good relationship with my students - but I will take what you said into consideration. I also know if they see a weakness, some of them will EAT YOU ALIVE... I teach in an metro city school with 2200 students. Weakness is not an option; you have to be tough. We are their teacher, their moma, their confidant, the only constant for alot of our kiddos. That's why I am concerned about making them scared - for many of them, we are their strength. If we are weak, then who will they turn to then? too many wrong choices out there... yeah, I love my job / career / daily life. I appreciate your suggestions and comments!
jess said:
Cris, I am just ending a 2 week medical leave from work because I could not do my job with this pain. And I work from home, away from coworkers and my boss! I can't imagine working "stage front" as a teacher with this. You have my respect!
I told my boss and coworkers I had a nerve disorder that was causing massive pain and I needed a couple of weeks to allow my meds to work. I didn't get into details.
However, I have an 18 yr old and a 15yr old that know about my conidition. I think you need to tell kids *something*. The rumors will fly around the school if you don't give them something to go on. Kids will make up the wildest stories about how you "spaced out" because you were on drugs or you had a "fit" or something ridiculous like that. I think you need to tell your students you are having a nerve problem, or just give fib a little and tell them you have TMJ and you get spasms in your jaw and you can't talk at that time and need to remove yourself from the classroom to massage your jaw or apply heat or something. You would be surprised how many teens know what TMJ is (and maybe suffer themselves!).
You should give them a specific task to complete while you are out of the room or even put one of the more responsible kids "in charge" but don't just leave them with nothing to do. :)
I hope this helps. Just remember that kids will make up something MUCH worse if you don't tell them what's going on.
Best of luck to you!
Jess
Thank you Elstep!
elstep said:
Cris, I am with Lisa on this one, and I would keep it simple and say you are suffering from nerve pain and need a little time alone until it passes. They are old enough to understand people have health issues and as Lisa says run it passed the school to make sure that this is ok with them. Do your school know about the condition?
My heart goes out to you and Amber as teaching must be the most difficult profession to do with TN. My son is also a teacher and I will ask him tonight what his thoughts are.
Thank you LyndaS!
LyndaS said:
Chris, I'd also say that while I've been homeschooling my kids in their early years with TN, at home we work a bit differently than when they are in their classes 2 days p/week. I only have one 5th grader now and this will be our last year (I think). We are hoping he will pass the test to get into the advanced program at a Jr HIgh/High School nearby where my oldest graduated from and my daughter is currently in 7th grade.
One good thing about TN is that when it began when they were babies, 2 & 3, I'd say it's time to go play w/o mommy now…I have to put heat on my owie…they'd kiss my cheek and be on their merry way. Now, I start my 5th grader and he goes from there, doing independent work until I get back to him. I'm able to get 3 solid hours of one-on-one and he manages 3 hours of independent work. When I'd go pale while in pain in the earlier years, everyone in my home knew what was happening to my face. I think you should explain to your colleagues about jaw/teeth/cheek pain as well as the kids. They will understand that you need to take a few moments to compose yourself when in pain. The good think about TN is that it knows where the back door is located!
With my home business, I told my clients back in 2002 when this happened and they still come to me for high-end design work and give me soft deadlines to work into my days. So, when I'm in pain, I rest, and when I'm pain free, I work. But this would be difficult for you in a classroom. Especially when speaking may provoke this monster. I really had to talk with my clients about it, albeit briefly, because my attitude would go from happy go lucky to a moaning type of speaking. It must have felt weird to them to call and hear me in my normal happy mood and then a few hours later hear the agony in my voice. I think more people will be impressed with your "whatever it takes, I will do this" attitude and the honest assessment of your condition. When we work towards our goals regardless of what obstacle is in view, we gain strength. Please take good care of yourself. I'll be praying for you.
Blessings!
Lynda
misstammie said:
I am a 4th grade teacher, and wouldn't tell my students/families for the first few months at a new school.
When I finally had to, because of all of the absenses, pain, etc. half of them were supportive, and the other half went about their business.
The thing is, only people that are around you every day will really know what you deal with. Your students will never really understand. But the thing I have noticed about young people, they do genuniely care. Be honest. Be human most of all.
They get it.
Cris, I'm a teacher, too. I teach middle school deaf and HH students. Happened to me many times. Blurry vision is really tough (which I experience on a daily basis, especially when I'm trying to interpret what they are signing to me). I agree with Lisa and elstep...keep it simple. (Memory loss is another issue I deal with on a daily basis.) I didn't tell them I have TN. I told them I have some issues that I am seeing a dr. for and that I am trying to feel better. They accepted this well and eventually became compassionate about it. Yes, I try to maintain professionalism, but it gets difficult at times. When I feel really bad, I change the activity, if possible. So many times, I just hide the pain, but it gets so hard. Sometimes I am wincing and don't even realize it until they ask me what is wrong. I wish I could tell you something that would really help, but learning to manage my meds really helped me the most. My neuro dr. prescribed a large amt. of 100 mg. pills (gabapentin) and gave me some flexibility in how to take them. Since I can manage the pain better, I don't have too many rough times in front of them. Before this, I wondered if I would be able to keep teaching. Now, I think I can. I'm glad I didn't tell them too much information, just what I thought they could handle and just enough info. so they could understand I had "moments" without sacrificing my teaching ability or credibility. Good luck and hang in there. I hope it does get better for you. I'm sure it will.
thank you very much for your perspective and understanding of what it is like...similar situations, similar scenarios - I have 100mg Teg so I can control how my day goes and how I take my meds also - and yes, the blurred vision along with the difficulty in 'gettin' my words' just kills me! One of the things we say in culinary is "KISS"...keep it simple silly...this usually applies to the technique in the lab, but yep, it certainly applies here too! Thanks again AzzureJ
AzzureJ said:
Cris, I'm a teacher, too. I teach middle school deaf and HH students. Happened to me many times. Blurry vision is really tough (which I experience on a daily basis, especially when I'm trying to interpret what they are signing to me). I agree with Lisa and elstep...keep it simple. (Memory loss is another issue I deal with on a daily basis.) I didn't tell them I have TN. I told them I have some issues that I am seeing a dr. for and that I am trying to feel better. They accepted this well and eventually became compassionate about it. Yes, I try to maintain professionalism, but it gets difficult at times. When I feel really bad, I change the activity, if possible. So many times, I just hide the pain, but it gets so hard. Sometimes I am wincing and don't even realize it until they ask me what is wrong. I wish I could tell you something that would really help, but learning to manage my meds really helped me the most. My neuro dr. prescribed a large amt. of 100 mg. pills (gabapentin) and gave me some flexibility in how to take them. Since I can manage the pain better, I don't have too many rough times in front of them. Before this, I wondered if I would be able to keep teaching. Now, I think I can. I'm glad I didn't tell them too much information, just what I thought they could handle and just enough info. so they could understand I had "moments" without sacrificing my teaching ability or credibility. Good luck and hang in there. I hope it does get better for you. I'm sure it will.